Nick Cannon is opening up on the insecurities he faced during his marriage to 34-time Grammy nominee Mariah Carey. During his recent appearance on the Ray Daniels Presents podcast, the 44-year-old comedian reflected on his struggles with identity crisis as the husband of an “alpha” woman.
Nick Cannon admits he was insecure in marriage to ex-wife Mariah Carey
Recalling his past relationship with Carey, the America’s Got Talent host said during Thursday’s episode of the podcast, “I didn’t actually really care what the world thought because the perception, you know, that is what it is. People are going to love you one day, hate you the next day.”
Cannon went on to say, “I could care less about that. … But going to myself with that pressure of, ‘Who am I?’” explaining that he dealt with a major identity crisis as the husband of the Emotions singer, who has been referred to as the “Songbird Supreme” by Guinness World Records.
“I got married in my 20s, you know what I mean? To the biggest star in the world,” the Wild ‘n Out host recalled, adding, “My trajectory was here (while gesturing downwards) and then hers — she’s already in a different stratosphere.” Cannon tied the knot with Carey in 2008 after just a few months of dating.
Revealing that he got “got really comfortable” with the lifestyle his marriage afforded him, Cannon explained that he had inhibitions about his personal goals and ambitions. “She got islands and I was waking up at noon and people bringing me steaks on a platter. But I’m like, ‘This ain’t the hustle,’” he said.
The Masked Singer host continued to say, “I would lay up at night thinking, like, ‘Is this who I am? Am I Mariah’s man? Is that what my life is supposed to be?’” before admitting, “There’s nothing wrong with it.”
Following the arrival of their twins, who they welcomed in 2011, Cannon struggled with his masculinity and the “hierarchy” of his family. “And then when you have children … Your manship is like, wait, I’m carrying a purse, the diaper bag, I’m standing on the corner. She’s rocking being all the alpha that she is,” he said.
When the podcast host asserted that Carey “deserves it,” the She Ball actor agreed, noting that “I believe she needs a dude like that. I’m just not that dude.” While Cannon tried his best to be a supportive husband to the Fantasy singer, he felt like a “participant” in her world.
“I’m the main character,” Cannon explained. “I was getting mad at myself. It was like muscle atrophy. I had a gut. It was like, I’m not being the dude God put me on this earth to be,” he continued.
“The love kept me there. I was like, ‘You need a support system. You need somebody that don’t want you for your money, that’s sincere, somebody that’s willing to build a family and raise some amazing kids together.’ That was my goal. But then there was something constantly in me,” the comedian added.
